Hell Week Begins

I knew this was the start of a long, bad week. I hadn’t expected the first day to go so bad. Frequently, when I expect the worse, it often proves overkill. To day was not one of those times. As a project manager I tend to expect certain disappointments, but today left me with some unexpected news that directly pushed my already ridiculous schedule further into oblivion. I met with testing people to listen to their concerns and offer poor solutions as to why they were the ones being squeezed when so many other missteps had already occurred. Then the bomb dropped. I communicated with my director on this project and she never provided input as to how best to handle the slippage. I continued and proceeded without it. Since, she never got back to me I started thinking…why am I so wound up about this unrealistic deployment date? I didn’t set it…I never promised it to anyone and although, I am the one putting the schedules together (based on the end date) and managing all the interfaces and so on…I am tired of being all stressed because of these unrealistic expectations.

Once I let this bad energy go, I felt so much better. I found that so much of the negativity I had been exuding disappeared. Frankly, this day has just reinforced why I am do ready to leave. I am so over this place. I want better, I want to get up in the morning happy to be going to work. I want to enjoy my job. I want more fulfillment and I am just fed-up. I am just trying to focus on that, there is something better out there for me, I know it.